Dating after a relationship or divorce
While it’s perfectly fine to sign up for a mainstream site like Match.com, using a niche site can help do some of the work for you by finding people who share the same values or passions as you do, Dr. If you’re looking for something a little less serious, the Tinder app can be a fun way to dip your toe back into dating.Just make sure to set the age range correctly so you don’t end up getting invited to college ragers (unless that’s what you’re looking for! When it comes to taking your online interactions into the real world, there is no hard and fast rule about when to meet, but make sure safety is your number one priority, says Walfish.Avoid this by looking at what worked and didn’t work in the past—including what part you played in the breakup—and identify goals.Visualizing your journey can help you see things you might have missed before, so take the time to actually write out your “relationship roadmap” in a journal. Talk it through with a therapist or trusted friend.When returning to dating after a longtime monogamous relationship (particularly one that ended badly), craving the excitement of a spark-filled romance is understandable.But Gandhi says you shouldn't discount a "slow burn." "Especially when we are dating after divorce, singles think immediate, blazing chemistry is the key thing to look for," she continues. Chemistry, especially for women, can grow over time—and may take many dates to begin to grow!
“Remember that your kids have recently suffered a major loss—their other parent—through your divorce and may still be hurting from that,” she says.Teens and adult children can be brought into the conversation sooner.Just be sure to answer their questions completely but without giving the extra details you reserve for your wine nights with your friends, Dr. “The older woman-younger man dynamic (and vice versa) doesn't always work out long-term” Dr. Of course, there are naturally always exceptions to the rule.Don't let well-meaning friends pressure you into dating before you’re ready, she adds.No, this isn’t some prudish warning or an encouragement to play games.